3.24.2013

The Creepy Masters Parade: Beds and Pajamas are for losers

Lessons are killing me softly
(Note:This post is ironical)
After a little visit to Sinnoh and Hoenn, I'm back to Unova to speak about
Lady Caitlin
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We can recognize her as the Sleeping Beauty of pokèmon. She's so lazy she doesn't even bother to get dressed waiting for a challenger. 
Besides, let's be serious: Who the hell sleeps with ballerina shoes and a cap that looks like a cake? You must be a psycho (Maybe this is the reason why she trains psychic type pokèmon). 
Not to mention the huge bush of hair this goddammit kid has, she needs two kinds of butterflies to prevent her golden waterfall to slither against the floor and get them dirty (as if she's the one who bothers washing them, she has butlers even for cleaning her teeth!). Honestly speaking, what the hell are those two kinds of butterfly, or hearts she has on her hair? Does she uses her psychic powers to hole that stuff up? I'm left wondering. 
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She's a damn spoiled brat, she doesn't even sleep in a bed like common humans, she needs...A ROSE. and not a simple one, a motherfucking floating one! 
You don't need to be a genius to understand she isn't one good at working at all. An Elite Four's task is to battle trainers, not to bark at them because they woke you up! 
But she is lady the goddamn Caitlin, she can do whatever the fuck she wants, and no one knows why. She used to piss the hell out of poor trainers in Sinnoh, crying out for fucking good battles and then ordering her butler so give points to the winner; sometimes, winning was just not enough for her, she wanted you to win in a certain (undefined) manner. 
When she broke down of doing nothing in Sinnoh, she decided she was able to fight (even if she had never had a fighting skill before), and (after scaring the hell out of half region using her psycho...ehm psychic powers) she deiced to leave for Unova where Alder accepted her as an Elite four just because he'd seen a way out of the financial problems.
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Sometimes, she still freaks out and her mates are forced to inject her tea to calm her down. 
Luckily for all the others Elites, she sleeps most of her time, so she just doesn't go bitching around and doesn't risk to get killed by some pissed up Marshal.

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